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Thursday, 26 April 2012

WHAT WILL YOUR CHILDREN BE TELLING?



When my twin sister and I were in first grade at school,  every morning we had Show and Tell... As you may recall, my father was an alcoholic and we saw many violent outbursts...

One particular Monday morning we announced in front of the whole class that our Daddy was drunk and threw Mummy's new Mixmaster bowl off the table, breaking it.  We were standing there together holding hands as we always did,  sure that this bit of horrifying gossip would be News du Jour!  There was always competition in the class for the most interesting Show and Tell...

We were very perplexed and quite scared when we had to take a note home from the teacher, Mrs Jenner.. She wanted to see Mum as soon as possible... was it something we said??

Mum duly went to see our teacher, and when we came home, we were given a rough toweling down and told that we weren't to tell in class what we saw happen at home. In fact, we weren't to tell anyone anything about our home life!  We were aghast and ashamed! And a little confused.

Apparently, there were things you didn't talk about and Dad breaking the Mixmaster bowl and being drunk was one of them.  At 6 there were a lot of things we had to learn.  And it was difficult. Really, when violence and drunkenness were a big part of our childhood, it was just another event that to us was normal in our abusive home...

What goes on in a home IS News du Jour for a child.  Let us hope what they see going on in yours does not bring embarrassment and shame on you like it did to my mother.... and if it does, remember that children who see it often, become desensitised and treat it as normal even if undesirable. If they talk about, don't blame them.

Make sure your children only see good things as their normality, if not, who knows what your children will be telling- and to whom?

© Glenys Robyn Hicks


Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6

18 comments:

  1. Wow. I am amazed at what God has brought you through, Glenys.

    You speak truth here-a potent reminder.

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    1. You know, Michelle, sometimes when I write about my life, it amazes me too... God has brought me through a lot of horrible things. I do love and praise Him so. Blessings!

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  2. Remeinded me of a gorgeous little four year old when I worked in a kindergarten, years ago.
    He announced one morning "When my dad comes home drunk Mum says, "You sleep in the laundry!"
    Precious little minds are very impressionable.

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  3. I couldn't do that as my mother taught at the same school I attended and taught me from Kindy through to Grade 3. She was very strict with me and I had to be very good. She didn't want anyone to think she was favouring me more than the other students :)

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    1. That would be so hard, yet I bet you are better for it! Imagine Show and Tell in your class! LOL Blessings!

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  4. Glenys,

    Thank you so much for visiting my blog AND giving me an award! I love your blog. I grew up with an alcoholic father as well. It is sad, but there really are so many things you do not talk about when an alcoholic is invoved. My dad is now a christian and hasn't drunk a drop since I was 16. But, I have to say, those years though forgiven are never forgotten.... those are years I still don't like to talk about. Thanks for sharing this little remembrance with us.

    Blessings,
    Amy Jo

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    1. Amy Jo, I think it is good to be honest about trials we have been through and that the LORD has brought us through. There are more people than we know who no doubt have suffered in a similar way, and it may encourage them to know that God does bring us through. You have a lovely blog, Amy Jo. It was my pleasure to offer you the Award! Blessings!

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  5. I taught in Kindergarten last year and boy, do those little ones say EXACTLY what goes on at home! Definitely need to make sure we are giving them good things to share.

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    1. Terri, I worked in a primary school (elementary) for a year before I met and married Chris. The things that the teachers of the pupils told us in the staff room were so funny... children are so innocent and everything is news du jour! Thanks for sharing tea with me today!

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  6. Wow, thanks for being so transparent, Glenys. I was just listening to Beth's Moore's series on Family Calamity and she used the story of David, Absolom and Amnon, and how (in an abusive home) one of the first things that happens is the call to silence. Sin loves the darkness but hates the light. If we purpose to live our lives in the light, we begin to see walking in the Spirit as the norm - and what an example THAT is for our children!

    Thanks for linking this up today. I'm so sorry for your pain growing up, but the challenge to us today is powerful.

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    1. I have been through a lot of horrible experiences, and now that I have the wisdom of age and hindsight, I can see that the LORD has always had His Hand on me.... I write of my experiences not for sympathy (it is all in the past, and my life is good now, Praise God)- but rather to perhaps help someone else going through a trial.... God is no respecter of people, what He has done for me, He will do for others.... I do so want to be an encourager! Thanks so much for taking tea with me, Kate. I appreciate you very much! Blessings!

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  7. Hi there Glenys, your post was so good! Thank you so much for sharing! You have been through so much in life and yet you help so many; you are such a blessing!
    Blessing!
    oxoxoxo

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    1. Yes, Jilly-as I wrote to Kate, I have been through a lot of horrible experiences, and now that I have the wisdom of age and hindsight, I can see that the LORD has always had His Hand on me.... I write of my experiences not for sympathy (it is all in the past, and my life is good now, Praise God)- but rather to perhaps help someone else going through a trial.... God is no respecter of people, what He has done for me, He will do for others.... I do so want to be an encourager! Thanks so much for taking tea with me, Jilly. I hope you are coping OK with your heart issues. I appreciate you too and often wonder how you are doing. Blessings!

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