Friday, 27 January 2012

Repentant Housewife



In our last move, when I cleaned our old house prior to handing back the keys to the real estate agent, I was shocked to see how much cat fur had gotten behind the blinds where our cat Snowy had slept in the sun from the window. It was a real eye opener.



There have been many times over the years where Chris would see something on the floor or hanging on a door and he would ask me if I had seen it. I have to be honest and say, no. It seems that I don't actually see a lot of things that need to be done or picked up.



I could make a thousand excuses and say with the amount of medication that I take, it is lucky that I can see at all... or that I am too tired with chronic fatigue and fibro brain fog to focus... or too busy or distracted. And to some degree, it would be the truth. But I feel it is for me a kind of blocking out of responsibilities that really only become realised on a need to attend to urgently basis.



In wanting our new home to be kept nice, I have pondered on my seeming spacing or *vegging* out on some tasks and I have come to the conclusion that it my attitude to my homemaking that creates a literal visual blindness to certain things. With practice over many years, I have become quite good at it.



Now I am not good at many things, but in being good at being blind to things that I should be doing is not a thing I am proud of. So as in all bad things, I have had to repent of my indifferent attitude to my home keeping. And with repentance comes effort to change. It has been hard.



No longer can I hide behind my illness constantly and do nothing but the bare minimum. I have had to pace myself and train myself to *see* things that require my attention. Then I have had to discipline myself to *do* whatever my eyes see needs to be done.



It sounds like a simple thing to do, but anyone who has denied their home keeping responsibilities and who has woken up as it were, needs to change- and that change is difficult. But it is a change that must be made because there is only me to keep our home nice. There is no Fairy Godmother.



I still use Sylvia's Lists on genuine bad days and I still have to count my spoons so I don't burn out, but I do see and *take note* of things that need to be attended to- and I *do* them. Not necessarily at once, but certainly as soon as I know within me that I have the strength and ability to do it. If I am feeling reasonably well, I use FlyLady.



The results have been interesting. There have been many changes which have all been positive. Chris is happier in our home, I am not afraid for people to call, I feel liberated from the anxiety of procrastinating, our home has become organised and stayed clean, and I feel closer to the LORD.



Which seems a funny thing to say, doesn't it? But becoming honest before Him and within yourself is always liberating and healthy and it fosters a closer relationship with Him. I am glad that He has opened my eyes wide.....



Blessings, Glenys


By much slothfulness the building decayeth; and through idleness of the hands the house droppeth through. Ecclesiastes 10:18

2 comments:

  1. I just read a blog post today, which focused on a similar topic - learning to keep the home as God has asked you to do despite your "down times" or inconsistent illnesses, even if it's only in small doses at a time.

    I feel that the Lord is speaking to me, for due to current health issues I am facing in my life, I have been struggling with proper home keeping matters.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts today.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mara, that is not to say that we are to push ourselves into another flare when we honestly are suffering. Apart from being painful, it is counter productive to our goals. I honestly cannot manage more than 15 minutes at a time. I set the timer on the oven for 15 minutes and do something in the house. When the timer goes off, I go online to rest and recoup- but not before I set it again for half an hour. Eventually I get the house in order and am not too frazzled to cook dinner.

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...